How does one know when it is time to call it quits? Usually when you are feeling that you want to quit - then that is not the time to make that decision. However, the days that you are content with the way things are will not be the day you make that decision either.
As a single mum that is self employed I always face this mountain as we head into the winter season when sales diminish and my arms don't seem long enough to make the ends meet. It is times like these that I question if my decisions are the right one.
Do I take the advice of caring loved ones who suggest I should get a stable job with a regular income?
Being the free spirit that I am that would mean sacrificing a lifestyle, a long hard earned dream, the passion of being an artist.
The tough times are short lived ... but not everyone is understanding and the bills certainly don't get paid with smiles and hugs.
Would sacrificing this choice and working in a traditional job environment bring financial stability - perhaps, but again in these challenging times even those who had been in well paid and established jobs found themselves being made redundant ... so where is the security in that? At least by being self employed my job is secure as long as I can stay on top of the bills and keep my health.
I have worked in traditional job settings for others - and the thought of going back to that kills my spirit!
(Not to mention wearing heels would hurt my feet - I love working in flip flops!)
So, am I being an irresponsible parent by pursuing my dream and doing something I enjoy .. something for me ... something creative .. even if it means life is at times a financial struggle?
I don't think having financial security brings happiness ... but it sure helps ease the stress.
I don't have the answers to this one ... but at least I have the questions ... and I find myself asking the same ones every year at this time ... and then before you know it the season has started all over again and the busy rush has us longing for the quieter days of winter.
How many years do I keep living in this cycle?
How do I know if it is time to quit and close this chapter of my life?
I waited until I got home to finish this entry ... and I am glad I did.
I needed to determine my Chocolate Pudding Moment for today to help me find a sense of appreciation at a time when I need it most.
My commute is just a matter of a minute by foot from my studio door to the marina in which I live. Meanwhile I know that most of the islanders are still sitting at their office desks or in the slow traffic commute home.
Tonight the water is flat calm and the pink sunset sky is giving the water a purplish tinge. There is barely a puff of breeze ... it is still and all is quiet and soul soothing.
My son is not home at the moment so there are no questions of supper time or noise of tv or music.
Serenity finds me taking a deep involuntary exhalation and breathing out the concerns of the day.
This is my Chocolate Pudding Moment .... a moment of serenity and reflection.
I may not have the answers to all of my questions ... but at least I know that I have the fortune of options and opportunities.
Is this the Time to Quit? I don't know for sure .. but this I do know - Now is not the time to answer that question.
Wishing you serenity for those challenging days when you question your choices and decisions and all you want to do is quit.
CPM and serenity to you.
sun
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